Back in Kentucky for the holiday weekend. My mom’s condo association is just mental*, as evidenced by the following letter outlining the rules and regulations for using the pool. Seriously, folks. This shit just writes itself.

I’m not sure what I like more: the injunction against hanging your wet towels and swimsuits up on your own enclosed patio (Looks like someone’s been using the facilities. Whoops!), the ban on booze (The hell?) or the reminder not to “smoke inside the pool.”

It begs to be answered– how do you get inside the pool, since it’s not actually a physically enclosed space? But I think the real questions are a)what is wrong with these people b)when did they last have sex, and c) is this pedantic nosy bullshit all I have to look forward to in my old age?

*Like the time she had a decorative holiday flag hanging outside our house, and received a very pointed letter telling her to take it down, since only the American flag could be flown. It was a fucking happy winter snowman, though they acted like she had just declared her undying allegiance to the Khmer Rouge.


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